Conan does analogies for SAT prep, I do antonyms for GRE prep. Someone very smart once told me opposites attract. I hope this attracts me a lot of ladies :) Alright! Giggidy giggidy giggidy!
[Note: These are antohymns. Please sing aloud to the melody of your favorite church song.]
trepidation :: confidence
New York Knicks :: success
Sarah Palin :: anything remotely good for humanity
cleanliness :: my dad's toenails-ness
whorehouse :: comic book store
commando :: underpants
thank you :: shiv to the abdomen...and twist
Sammy Sosa :: blackface
delicious :: cream cheese with vanilla ice cream (dairy was a bad idea!)
Pope Ratzinger :: Obi Wan Kenobi
health insurance :: Republican idiocy
Muslim :: Muoverweight
gladiolas :: unhappyolas (Note: my cousin told this joke at his wedding. Yes, that's right, his wedding. Best of luck to his wife.)
butter face :: jelly ass
belly flop :: washboard abs river (a Texas Hold 'Em joke? Really?)
miniscule :: Rush Limbaugh's FACE
dry skin :: wet turkey breast
sense :: this blog
complete devotion to artistic integrity and aesthetic goodness :: Black Eyed Peas
mortal enemy :: my best friend Zombie Teddy!
self-affirming experience :: that time I fell asleep in freshman Bio and I had a dream about Ligers (lion + tiger) and I yelled myself awake in front of the whole class by yelping out loud "Please don't bite me Mr. Pussy Cat!!" to which the teacher replied, "I won't bite...hard."
clowns :: kind-hearted people that make children smile
the beginning of a book :: the end of fun and leisure
cinnamon :: antonym
reading my blog :: curing cancer, ending world hunger, fixing the environment, solving the economic crisis, ensuring world peace, erasing the hate, etc. etc.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
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