Google has radically changed the world through its robust search engine and vast array of free, user-friendly software. Unfortunately, sometimes its products work too well. Not only does google list likely search terms before you finish typing, it also lists your most recent searches, revealing to any guest on your personal computer your most secret online pursuits. These searches often indicate clandestine desires, innermost fears, closeted fetishes, guilty pleasures, and also laughable ignorance.In hopes of using online transparency to come to terms with my delusional self, I now share with you, "My Most Embarrassing Google Searches" of the past 10 days:
- men's thongs
- used women's thongs
- Sailor Moon fan fiction anthology
- tight sailor outfits sale
- schmegma smell
- plant porn, ficus fuck
- lyrics I'm too sexy
- magic tricks picking up women
- Happy Ending New York
- back hair hereditary
- mouth sores webmd
- personalized double-edged light saber with authentic sound effects
- cougar match.com
- Tribeca "over 40" bars
- Joey Lawrence cardboard cutout
- "youth in asia" definition
- tips holding in flatulence dates
- nipple-hair tweasing regrowth
- craigslist friend for a day hugs
- elevator conversation prompts
- grow watermelon stomach by swallowing seeds
Let this be a warning to all you curious and inquisitive web surfers: Don't forget to clear your search history, and wash behind your ears! WHOAH!
