Defurries!

Colleges, grad schools, law schools, etc. often subscribe to an odd practice in which eager-beaver prospective students gain acceptance to such prestigious institutions only to chicken out by deferring their admission for a year. Upon describing such a situation, envious friends of the deferrers inevitably remark that had they known of this option, they too would've preferred to defer. Instead they cry themselves to sleep every night, with a bottle of Jack and Jergens, knowing that their lives are basically over. FAIL.

But what if other things in life could be deferred but we were just unaware of the option? Why not try it out just in case the possibility actually exists? That way we can prevent future wallowing by putting off stressful things and instead take the time to find ourselves either by hoing it up in foreign countries, or hitchhiking/getting kidnapped across the US, or patiently waiting for that Tanzanian prince to pay you back 1000 fold for that small lump sum you wired to him.

Here are a few examples of situations you may want to try out the deferral policy:

"Thanks Doc, I think I'll defer that liver cancer for a year."

"What?? Your pregnant??? I think I'm gonna defer you for a year...or 18."

"Yay, dairy-laden dessert! I'll defer you until I'm closer to a toilet."

"Hand over my wallet? Uhh, I'm deferring this mugging for a while, at least until after I train with Master Roshi and perfect the Kamehameha."

"Yes, the throne of Gandor is quite the honor. But I'm gonna have to defer so I can bang my elf bride for a few years. You wouldn't believe what those pointy ears can do."

"Nice to meet you Grim Reaper. Let's defer this encounter indefinitely...No go?...Hey! Look! A burning blimp is crashing into that building!" ::runs the other way::

"Hello day-of-first-date zit. I'm deferring you from my nose to my ass. Don't worry, it's cozy down there."

"You wanna get back together? I defer! All the single ladies, all the single ladies! Put your hands up, oh ohh ohhh oh oh ohh! Cuz if you liked it, then you shoulda put a ring on it!! If you liked it then you shoula put a ring on it..."