New Carnival Game: Bush-a-mole

Ironically enough, Bush had always been preparing for this day. He went so far as to perfect his swinging British accent, just so he could say with perfect comedic pitch after such an incident, "That really hurt! Who throws their shoe?! Honestly!"



But alas, his cat-like reflexes overcame his comedic sensibilities, and Bush became harder to hit than a Giants wide-receiver in December. However, reports indicate that immediately following the penny loafer attack, the president, overcome with apparent post-traumatic stress, muttered over and over, "Not in the face, Dick! Not in the face!" At which point a mysterious bearded man in tattered robes and worn sandals appeared. Known only as The Son, he spoke esoterically, chiding the audience, "He that is without sin among you, let him cast the first Bruno Magli."

Later in the day Hush Puppies announced their Spring 2009 line which will include the new leather oxfords Bush Puppies, described as "devastatingly presidential and perfect for projectile violence."